Post on Prayer..........

Episcopalians are often not the most forward in talking about their faith and religious practise – and I confess that I, too, find this quite difficult. But I was talking about prayer in a (relatively) recent post, and I guess there is a certain requirement to follow this with an update........

The series of sessions on prayer reached completion today, and has earned commendation. Carefully prepared and competently presented, it has been a most useful prompt and encouragement, helping to draw the practice of prayer into focus.

As to my personal regular Moments of Quiet that had started so well, and seemed to be taking me forwards into a more positive scenario........... these slipped out of my personal calendar and consciousness with my week away, then lay dormant during the next ten days of infection, and hadn’t yet re-established as A Happening....

In the second to last week the prayer course was engaging our imaginations to ‘join in’ a scene from the Life of Christ – specifically, with the story of Christ preaching to crowds on the shore of Lake Gennesaret, getting into a boat with fishermen who had been fishing all night and catching nuthin’..........
So where was I in this scene ? Creeping quietly into a vacant corner of the boat, mostly out of the way but able to help out a bit if an extra pair of hands was required........... As ‘A Member Of The Team’ ? Well, probably not, because I was loathe to intrude, the central characters being a bit grumpy after their long, cold, hardworking but unsuccessful night......
Well, I guess you know the story........ the boat puts out from shore, Christ tells the guys to cast their nets once more – and THIS time there are more fish caught than the nets can hold, a second boat comes over to help out, BOTH boats seem likely to sink because of the number of fish, but they get back to shore and the fishermen abandon everything - fish, nets, boats – to follow this amazing Jesus Man and ‘become fishers of men’....

I’m not very good at engaging with this sort of prayer. I don’t usually find much of an end result. ‘Interesting’, maybe, perhaps intellectually intriguing (I mean, what DID the situation smell like...... what were the guys talking about ? ....... were they listening to the teacher ? - and just WHAT did they think when Jesus got into their boat in the first place – weren’t they hoping to head off home to bed and get a bit of a kip ? .....and so on) ......... but er, not, actually, personally positive as an exercise.........

Next, the group had a cup of coffee, mulled over the exercise a little, then set off as separate individuals to find separate space in the church and re-visit the scene (or try a new one).

So, here's an empty pew. get comfy. Enter into the head again, fire up the imagination.......... and where am I ?................. overlooking the lake, the boats are there, but everybody else has gone.......... the place is quiet, not a lot happening........ the waves come and go (as waves often do, gently, repetitively.......). Relaxing...... but a bit lonely. Kind of EMPTINESS. Where had everyone GONE ?

So how was this about me, my faith, my ‘religious life’ ? My ‘Relationship With Christ’ even. (I guess you’ll be aware that is what this whole Christian thing is about – ‘Personal Encounter With Christ’ – recognizing the impact this has on your life, and aiming to use this as a positive influence in the way you live your life with everyone you encounter).

Now I SAID I’m no expert about this stuff.......

Anyway – there in my imagination, wondering where Jesus was, I became aware of this remarkably ordinary guy - Jesus - coming to sit beside me and share this vantage point overlooking the scene........ no words, nothing being said, but a most overwhelmingly companionable presence, sitting down next to me, allowing me to lean a little and feel support............ Kinda weird, but comforting.

So - was this just ME, consciously inventing the scene and manufacturing ‘cosy thoughts’ ?

I dunno. Does the ‘how’ matter ? There is a wealth of books out there about this sort of prayer, and so far I’ve read none of them. Will I ? – Dunno.

Have you any suggestions you could share with me?